Physiology of Ejaculation

As you probably already know, ejaculation is a two-stage process, consisting of emission and ejaculation.

During the emission phase, sympathetic nerve cells induce contractions of the smooth muscles of the epididymis and vas deferens so that sperm moves into the prostatic urethra.

Then, the seminal vesicles and prostate gland also contract, thereby producing seminal fluid that mixes with sperm. Additionally, secretions of the bulbourethral glands are added to the mixture of fluids that becomes semen.

This process is experienced as the point of no return, the point of ejaculatory inevitability, the point at which ejaculation will happen no matter what the man does next.

This is followed by the expulsion phase in which the semen is expelled from the penis by contractions of the muscles of the pelvic area.

As Marcel Waldinger says, “the preganglionic sympathetic nerves involved in the emission phase originate from the intermediolateral columns of the spinal thoracolumba cord and travel via the sympathetic chain and hypogastric nerve (post ganglionic) to the pelvic plexus (the inferior hypogastric plexus) or via the sympathetic chain and pelvic nerve to the pelvic plexus. The pelvic plexus the sympathetic nerves are mediated by the cavernous nerve to the vase deferentia.”

During emission the bladder neck muscle contracts so as to prevent semen from entering the bladder, a process known as retrograde ejaculation.

It’s apparently pressure on the walls of the posterior urethra which initiate ejaculation, a process mediated via the pudendal and pelvic nerves.

This explains why extensive foreplay, which produces more secretions in the male sexual glands, triggers a more forceful ejaculatory reflex when sexual stimulation has reached the trigger point.

How To Overcome Premature Ejaculation

Rapid ejaculation is common in all men, not just young men who have not learned the art of ejaculatory control.

As you know, in all men there is a point in the sexual arousal cycle where ejaculation becomes inevitable.

The problem for men who ejaculate too soon is that they reach this point far too quickly, ejaculating perhaps upon genital to genital contact or maybe even in the first stages of physical contact.

Of course such rapid ejaculation is extremely disappointing to both man and woman, but it’s very frustrating indeed for a woman who has not had time to achieve orgasm.

Some men are unable to delay his ejaculation and displays the same pattern of premature ejaculation time and time again. This makes them aware they cannot completely control their sexual responses, and also makes them anxious about disappointing their partners.

Some sexual shame, as well as a loss of self-esteem, pride and confidence in their sexuality may also develop.

This anxiety and shame can have several consequences.

It may lead to erectile dysfunction, it may lead to sexual avoidance (true especially if he is regularly criticized by sexual partners for his poor sexual performance), and it may lead to an increasing cycle of anxiety – reinforcing premature ejaculation – causing more anxiety – every time he attempts to have sex.

Controlling Your Ejaculation

As I said earlier, controlling premature ejaculation is actually fairly easy.

In practice treatment works much better if both partners are involved and the couple have good communication skills.

This is because a mutual sense of responsibility and willingness to explore the emotional and sexual issues is almost a prerequisite for a complete cure.

Moreover, having an open-minded attitude about new sexual techniques that may help change the man’s pattern of sexual response is also beneficial in slowing down his ejaculatory response to sexual stimulation.

The difficulty comes when there are some fundamental problems between a couple which have not been resolved.

This could include anger, resentment, or more particularly psychological issues related to one individual within the partnership, such as the man’s deep-seated fear of women (or vice versa).

In these circumstances professional help may be necessary to improve communication skills or to unravel the deep psychodynamic issues which lie at the heart of this dysfunction.

There is little agreement about the definition of premature ejaculation.

Neither is it clear how various aspects of the condition are linked together.

Two researchers surveyed the degree of ejaculation control of over 100 male university students, asking them to self-report on ejaculatory latency (time before ejaculation after penetration) and their belief about how much control they had over their ejaculation.

They found that these two data sets were only modestly related, sharing, on average, only 10% of the variance.

The problem is that we don’t know how reliable the men’s description of their own sexual and ejaculatory behavior actually is!

The problem of the reliability of self-reports of men’s lovemaking habits has been looked at by a few authors.

In one study, the reliability of men’s reports of the time they take to ejaculate was examined by comparing how long they said they lasted during sex and examining them in a laboratory to see how long they actually lasted before ejaculation.

However the conditions are so different, so this really adds very little to our understanding of the condition.

Truth is, the ejaculation speed of men with premature ejaculation is not likely to be the same in the lab as it is bed with a sexual partner, nor is it likely to give much indication of how long they can last during lovemaking.

In short, instead of looking at men’s estimates of the length of time they last before ejaculating during sexual intercourse, we need to ask their partners some questions and see what they have to say on the subject.

Regular or long-term partners are able to provide information about how long the man can last before he ejaculates, or whether he ejaculates before he penetrates his partner.

Once you have this data you can compare what the partner says about these matters with the man’s report of how long he can last. You can also work out if he knows how to control premature ejaculation, and whether he is able to control the timing of his ejaculation.

You can also assess whether or not he is worried about ejaculating too rapidly, and establish his anxiety about how much control over ejaculation he actually has. Learn more about how PE affects a relationship here.

Most research has split men into rapid ejaculators and non-rapid ejaculators based on what the man says about his own sexual performance.

But some scientists have included objective measures of rapid or premature ejaculation (i.e. how long he lasts before he comes) as well as asking the man about how he sees his ejaculation (i.e. normal or premature).

They found that about one man in five claimed to have a problem with premature ejaculation.

With the help of seven criteria which could be used to predict when a man would report that he had a problem ejaculating too quickly, they soon found that there were several components to self-identified rapid ejaculation.

These are a behavioral component (how fast the man ejaculates), an affective component (what he feels about it), and an efficacy component (what he does about it).

They also studied what a man’s partner thinks about her man’s speed of ejaculation.

The Psychological Factor

Which brings us to the other important part of quick ejaculation: how the man feels. 

When a man thinks he ejaculates too quickly with no control, he’s usually upset about it: he feels shamed, humiliated and like a sexual failure. 

So rapid ejaculation may therefore become a trigger for internal criticism and negative self-talk.

This sets up a vicious cycle: the negative feelings after sex eat away at a man’s self confidence, which make him more anxious about ejaculating too early next time.

More anxiety means more performance pressure, which makes it more likely that he will ejaculate “too soon” next time… and, sure enough, he does!